Category: Trainwreck!

Game Over – Destroy It (#JustOnePercent 2/100)

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Developer: Destroy It

Release Date: February 23, 2021

MSRP: $9.99

Well, it didn’t take long for me to find a game that made me really glad I put the caveat in about not having to play something for an hour if I completed it sooner. Destroy It sounded cool in theory – take a robot and smash it into things to make it fall apart. After all, who doesn’t like breaking things and destructible environments?

Just so there’s no potential for misunderstanding – had I spent full price on this one, I would be refunding it, but at $0.99 I’m going to call it a lesson learned. Sure, the reviews weren’t great, but to be fair, there aren’t even enough of them for Steam to have decided on a rating. I thought I would give it a chance.

With four minutes played, I feel as if I have seen everything Destroy It has to offer. There are only three “levels”, and they all consist of something on a rapidly spinning screen, with the same three bars of music looped over and over. You pick up the robot with the left mouse button, and use it to break things. That’s it. That’s everything there is.

The physics isn’t even satisfying. Things just kind of float in the air. To add insult to injury, the last level doesn’t even break into all that many pieces. On the upside, at least it’s available in a whole bunch of languages?

Clearly, I cannot recommend Destroy It. There just isn’t enough of anything here to really feel like I’ve played a game. Sometimes we find gold, sometimes we find rocks. This one is really just a dirty pebble.

SteamDB estimates that Destroy It has sold somewhere between 300 and 900 copies on Steam, giving it a ranking of 10,563 out of 10,967 Steam releases in 2021.

Trainwreck! – Streamer Life Simulator

Posted in Demos, Steam Game Festival, Trainwreck!6 Comments

Ok folks, I don’t even know where to start with this one. So I’m going to state the obvious – impulse buying is bad! Impulse downloading of free demos can also be bad. However, neither of those is likely to be quite as bad as the Streamer Life Simulator demo.

Become one of the most popular people in the world, starting from scratch. Improve your character and buy yourself new equipments. Move from your bad neighborhood and settle in new neighborhood with stronger internet infrastructure. Create the computer with the features you want and start streaming. You can chat with your followers and collect donations. You can invest with the money you earn and increase your money. By following the new games and events. Buy new games. By playing the right game at the right time. Let new people discover you. Prove yourself to people and win tournament prizes by participating in tournaments of popular games. You can interact with your environment and do some different work to earn additional money.

It sounds ok, doesn’t it? I wasn’t expecting the all-time best simulator ever, but I am just boggled here. The little bit of the core mechanics I played around with were fine – set up your desk, put your PC together, set up your streaming account, and buy your first game. A little fiddly, but no big deal. Possibly also a whole heck of a lot of copyright infringement, but … eh, satire, I guess?

While waiting for my newly purchased game to download on the world’s slowest internet, I decided to go exploring outside a bit, and well, now I understand why the internet sucks.

WHAT IS THIS EVEN?

Apparently, something very very bad indeed has happened out here, and I no longer care about Steem or starting my career in streaming, I want to know what’s up with the world because I am no longer expecting the microphone and camera I ordered to ever show up because this is some post-apocalyptic nonsense right here.

Since nothing in the outside world is interactable, and after looking around the whole neighborhood, my game is STILL downloading, I decide I’ve probably seen more than enough.

Better late than never, I take a glance at other games put out by the same dev, and it all makes just a little more sense now.

Hey, I understand that not all art is created equal, and I although I might criticize details, I hate calling any kind of art bad. But the Streamer Life Simulator demo was definitely some kind of trainwreck, and it was one I had to escape by force closing the program through Task Manager.